Saturday, February 12, 2011
This was supposed to be about wrestling that has transpired in January, and is about to transpire in February, but there's something I need to get off my chest. Here goes...
On Friday, I was walking my daughter home from school (Zoe is six and in Grade One), and she was upset: it was Crazy Hair Day at school, and Kim and I went all-out helping her get as crazy a 'do as possible. We filled her hair up with pomade, gel, hairspray and temporary red and blue dyes, and put her hair up in some funky spikes: it got a lot of comments about how cute and crazy it was, and she was so proud of it as we dropped her off at school that morning. Unfortunately, it also got some negative comments…from lazy kids that never even took part in the school-wide event. Four kids that couldn't be bothered to put in any effort, found the need to make fun of someone who did.
As a parent, that riles me up: first off, how dare anyone mess with MY KID. But I can't be there to fight all of my children's schoolyard battles; they eventually have to grow up and need to be able to deal with this garbage on their own. So I explained to Zoe that, unfortunately, life is full of negative clowns that would rather tear stuff down than build things up; you have to rise above and realize that you're better than that nonsense. These people never stop complaining, never stop criticizing…and never stop slacking and never stop refusing to put in the effort that is made by the people they feel the need to mock.
It's how losers justify their crappy lot in life. A prime example is my "real" job, where I was promoted quickly and repeatedly during my first year: the company recognized my work ethic and rewarded me in spades. But people that had been there for years (and were going nowhere, career-wise), made excuses: I was a brown-noser, I was related to the boss, and all other manner of things that just weren't true. Rolling up your sleeves and doing a job that others can't do (or, as is more often the case, won't do), doesn't make you a person to be mocked: maybe those critics should take a look in the mirror and change their crappy outlook on life.
So, like anything I write or talk about, all this leads me back to wrestling. I'm not going to lie: I have been a negative person when it comes to wrestling. It can be as frustrating behind the scenes, as it is rewarding in front of the crowd. But I've made a conscious effort in 2011 to accentuate the positive backstage; it's hard, but I'm trying. Now it's time to move beyond the backstage into other realms of wrestling.
Lately, I've been involved with a Twitter "feud" with "Gorgeous" Michelle Starr that I have decided needs to be nipped in the bud. Meanwhile, J.J. Jetson is currently trying to engage me in a similar Facebook "feud" that I'm not interested in, either. Any critics of mine will instantly dismiss this as me being sensitive about being called "a fat piece of shit," which is one of two underlying themes these two like to hammer home, again and again; the other point they keep churning out is that I'm a shitty wrestler that doesn't deserve to be in a wrestling ring. The main reason I'm not down with this is that these aren't following "Wrestling 101" when it comes to drumming up potential interest in a match. Numerous veterans from the territory days discuss the "Wrestling 101" of promos: you can’t fully degrade your opponents while trying to build yourself up. Lance Storm has an older column about this, where he got a strip torn off him by Bulldog Bob Brown for making just such a blunder in his rookie days: If you say my opponent is a piece of garbage and isn't worth my time, than why would anyone pay to see you wrestle him? And worse…what happens when that "piece of garbage" pins you in the middle of the ring or makes you tap out? How big of a loser are you?
Think of the great heel promo men from the past: Ric Flair, Tully Blanchard, Arn Anderson, Terry Funk, Roddy Piper. Yes, they insulted people: called them fat, ugly, egg-sucking dogs, etc. The Horsemen used to make fun of the Road Warriors for not being able to last more than 20 minutes in the ring, even. But at any time did these masters suggest the fans shouldn't buy a ticket to see these people? Never: it doesn’t make sense. Maybe too many of us have spent so much time listening to shoot interviews from these same promo guys: interviews that ARE full of negativity, where these same masters with words go behind the curtain and actually say I think so-and-so was a worthless piece of shit and didn't belong in the ring, that we start to think it's acceptable to always talk like that? Food for thought.
It's funny that the UFC seems to get this better than wrestling itself these days: when Georges St. Pierre stormed the Octagon and first confronted Matt Hughes, did he say he was a worthless piece of shit that can't wrestle? No: he said he didn't respect Hughes and he promised to "tap him out" and take his title. Same goes for Josh Koschek: he generated a ton of heat by promising to beat GSP in his hometown of Montreal...but did he claim GSP was "a talentless yardtard" that isn't worth buying a ticket to see? Of course not, Dana White would've probably fired him for killing ticket sales! Instead, he just told Canada to prepare for the fact that he was going to beat their hero on his home turf. Classic wrestling heel…which is too bad he's in the UFC, instead.
There's another reason I'm no longer interested in this nonsense: and that's respect. Without Michelle Starr and his efforts over the past two-plus decades, Independent Wrestling in B.C. might not even be around right now. The amount of sacrifices Starr has made—money, time, energy, blood, sweat, tears—are debts the rest of us cannot ever hope to repay. The vast majority of wrestlers you have seen in this province were either trained by Starr, brought into the province by Starr, or were involved in high-profile feuds that either involved Starr…or were put together by him and his booking teams. My current "Mad Dog" gimmick was inspired by Starr: he initially wanted me to be a Moondog, but I wanted to still keep the "Marty Sugar brand," so I tweaked his idea and made it work for me…and I've had more success, more bookings, and more opportunities (in the ring and behind the scenes), because of the persona he suggested. For that, I am grateful; as are a lot of other people. It's why when Starr says insane things on Twitter and Facebook, we just nod and let it go: we respect the crazy bugger and appreciate his eccentricities.
On the flip-side of the coin, I don't really have a lot of respect for J.J. Jetson, who seems to have a hard time separating reality from fiction. I say this because I sent some private emails to him, asking him to cease and desist with the comments he was making, as they were upsetting my friends. He said he didn't care, and that "it's all a work, brother," then insulted me repeatedly in private messages...all while claiming it was still a work. If you can't turn off the gimmick in private, you need to seek help: end of story. This man has resorted to having his wife send harrassing emails to other wrestlers' wives, amongst other things; how does this sell tickets? Let's go one step further: on Facebook, Jetson and his wife have been slamming several people: Starr, myself, even wrestling fans. Some of these fans work on wrestling websites that help promote Independent Wrestling in Canada; one gentlemen was so upset he contemplated shutting down his website permanently…all because of one person's abusive comments. Is that an extreme reaction? Possibly. But that's a potential marketing and advertising tool FOR EVERYONE that could've been flushed down the drain if the webmaster involved hadn't been convinced that in this specific instance, one bad apple doesn't ruin the proverbial cart. How is this different than trashing a hotel room and burning a town, or destroying a dozen or more chairs during an impromptu "hardcore spot" and costing a promoter money?
Sure, it's publicity...but it's NEGATIVE publicity. The old adage "any publicity is good publicity" doesn’t work anymore…if it ever did. Ask the WWE if all that negative publicity surrounding Chris Benoit was a good thing for their business? Yep, it’s been so great for business that Vince McMahon had to make a second trip before Congress, and the WWE has gone out of their way to pretend the guy never existed! But any publicity is good publicity, right? Right?
So why do independent wrestlers think it’s a good idea to try and "sell tickets" by degrading the talent at the events they want to be a part of? Or, what seems even sillier to me, by insulting the promoters they would like to have book them? Hey, promoter-guy, I think you're a total piece of shit and my wife and I told everyone to not come to your show…when am I booked next? How about when Hell freezes over? This is where I give ECCW a lot of credit, as I have seen Scotty Mac make all types of comments on Twitter about his opponents: that he hates the color purple because he hates El Phantasmo, that he plans to run circles around Junior or beat the snot out of Danni Deeds in his hometown of Abbotsford...but despite being one of the most-talented wrestlers in Western Canada, does he say so-and-so is total garbage and it's not worth my time to even wrestle him? Of course not, he's got a business to run and tickets to sell; and ECCW has consistently had big crowds to prove it, haven't they?
Meanwhile, these unprofessional comments are also upsetting other people: what about family members that visit Facebook and have nothing to do with wrestling? Does your mother or grandmother need to read that someone thinks you're a piece of shit and a horrible human being? These poor women probably have enough to deal with, what with the skyrocketing prices of medications and the tiny buttons on the new-fangled cordless phone you bought them to replace their trusty old rotary models.
Here’s a crazy thought: if you want to do written "promos" on the internet, join an e-fed game and talk crap there. Or set up your own personal website and write columns about all the stuff that pisses you off...
Until next time, Sugar Addicts.
P.S. In summary, so as to avoid confusion, I will of course continue to do business with Michelle Starr: every promotion in Western Canada (and beyond) should. The man has a wealth of knowledge, and is outstanding at riling up the crowd the right way. This column isn't to knock Starr at all: as stated above, I have nothing but respect for what he has done for wrestling...both in the ring, and behind the scenes. I was just as much to blame in our little "feud," which is why I spoke to him privately before moving forward with this. It's time to do what the old song says: accentuate the positive, eliminate the negative...and don't mess with Mr. In-Between.